In my honest opinion...

Opinions are wonderful, they can be empowering, educational and intriguing. Everybody has at least one. Opinions are what make us diverse and exciting.

Opinions also have a dark side,  a difference of opinion can destroy a relationship.

Have you ever complained to a friend about a situation, just wanting to process some small frustration, only to have your friend vehemently insist that you're a complete idiot for not  dumping your boyfriend or telling off your boss?

It's terrible to feel that unless you give in and do what you're friend insists, they will think less of you. You're being held hostage by someone else's opinion, and if you do give in, you think less of yourself, it shakes your confidence.

I once had a friend who had so many opinions about my life and how to live it that I had to cut all ties with her. We were locked in a vicious power struggle over who knew better what was best for me. At the end of the relationship, I felt like a shadow, having allowed this person to force their opinion of me, on me, for years.

It's a hard line to walk, being vulnerable enough to confide in someone, and strong enough to say "none of your business" when that person oversteps.

Life is about mistakes and lessons, some good, some bad. Some of the best things about me have been borne from my greatest mistakes, and I am immensely grateful for them. 

Please Listen

When I ask you to listen to me

and you start giving me advice,
you have not done what I asked.

When I ask you to listen to me
and you begin to tell me why I shouldn't feel that way,
you are trampling on my feelings.

When I ask you to listen to me
and you feel you have to do something
to solve my problem,
you have failed me, strange as that may seem.

Listen!

All I ask is that you listen.
Don't talk or do - just hear me.
Advice is cheap - 20 cents will get you both
Dear Abby and Billy Graham in the same newspaper. 

And I can do for myself; I am not helpless.

Maybe discouraged and faltering, but not helpless.

When you do something for me that I can
and need to do for myself,
you contribute to my fear and inadequacy.

But when you accept as a simple fact

that I feel what I feel, no matter how irrational,
then I can stop trying to convince you
and get about this business of understanding
what's behind this irrational feeling. 

And when that's clear, the answers are obvious

and I don't need advice.
Irrational feelings make sense
when we understand what's behind them.

Perhaps that's why prayer works - sometimes -

for some people, because God is mute.
and he doesn't give advice or try to fix things.
God just listens and lets you work it out for yourself.

So please listen, and just hear me.

And if you want to talk,
wait a minute for your turn,
and I will listen to you.

Author Unknown